Healthy Sexuality – Using Your Sexual Rights to Enhance Healthy Sexuality!


In the summer of 1999 at the 14th World Congress of Sexuality, the Declaration of Sexual Rights was adopted. The participants sought to advance the cause of sexual health. They declared that sexual health is one of our basic Human Rights. They, further, adopted eleven (11) basic Sexual Rights to assure that human beings and societies develop Healthy Sexuality. Sexual Rights #7 – #11as adopted by the 14th World Congress of Sexology are presented below:

7. The right to sexually associate freely: This right identifies that each person has the freedom to choose to marry or not, to divorce and establish other types of responsible sexual associations.

8. The right to make free and responsible reproductive choices: This right includes whether or not to have children, as well as the number and spacing of children. It grants each person full access to the means of fertility regulation.

9. The right to sexual information: Such sexual information is intended to be based upon scientific inquiry, generated through unencumbered and yet scientifically ethical inquiry, disseminated appropriately at all societal levels.

10. The right to comprehensive sexuality education: Education in sexuality is intended to be a lifelong process from birth throughout the life cycle. It includes the involvement of all social institutions.

11. The right to sexual healthcare: This Right is broad in scope. It is intended to be available for prevention and treatment of all sexual concerns, problems and disorders.

You give yourself a gift by honoring and expressing your own sexual rights. This gift supports you to create your own healthy sexual self and to express yourself fully — emotionally — through your sexuality!

I encourage you to USE these rights over and over as solid expressions of your own healthy sexuality! I further invite you to find new ways to extend these rights in your life, so as to intensify the healthy elements that the pleasure and satisfaction of loving sexuality add to your life and that of your partner.

Take Your Sexual Temperature

Sometimes you get so stuck sexually and you are so used to feeling stuck, you have no way to gauge how or why.

I see this a lot with new sex coaching clients and prospects. If a woman has gotten far enough in her process to call me, she at least has some sense that her sexuality needs attention. Sometimes that’s as much as she knows. Figuring out the way into it or how to break it down feels hard and the whole of her sexual issues becomes a series of symptoms with vague ideas of the root causes.

I recently spoke to a woman who described her sexuality as a ball with no handles that just rolls and rolls and she doesn’t know where or how to get a grip on it. I think many people feel this way about sexuality because it’s so big and so many potential issues come up that they do not know where to begin.

You can start by taking your own sexual temperature, so to speak. Look at the various key aspects of your sexuality and if you could literally take your temperature, how would the mercury rise and fall?

Your Sexual Temperature Key

COLD: Totally shut down, not happening, needs life-support now!

LUKEWARM: On life-support, barely keeping its pulse but trying to survive.

WARM: Things are moving a bit, maybe slowly, maybe not all in the best direction, but there is motion and a will to be in a more healthy place. Throw me a blanket.


Functioning optimally, this part feels healthy and balanced, in a place of “normalcy”. Right on target.

OVERHEATED: Overall, functioning well and with a lot of energy, but energy is a bit out-of-balance.


Manic functioning or over-indulgence in this area. Need to reconnect to self and rebalance. Way off your center./tr>

Sometimes sexual fever is fun but that’s not what I’m talking about here!

What are areas of your sexuality where you could apply this? There are many aspects of your sexuality that you want to check in with regularly. For starters, do a temperature check on these seven:

• Your sexual body and how you are feeling in your body
• Your level of pleasure and joy, both emotional and physical
• Your desire and attraction, both the quality and level
• Your radiance and excitement-are you glowing daily?
• Your intimate relationships, with self and/or with partners and lovers
• Your energy level, overall and sexually
• Your sexual and creative expression

Your Sexual Empowerment Assignment

Take a moment with each area and stick in the thermometer and read it honestly.

If your temperature is below normal in any of these areas, think about 3 things you could do to breathe life back into this part, starting today.

If you are sexually homeostatic, what are 3 things you love and appreciate about the healthy temperature of this part?

And if you are overheated or feverish, what 3 things could you do to recalibrate and rebalance to a place of sexual homeostasis and optimal functioning?

Take your sexual temperature regularly and prevent your sexuality from falling to a place of being ignored, neglected, or into total disrepair.

If you are struggling to take the next steps and know you would benefit from guidance and support, you may want to work with a sex coach or therapist to get to the next level and begin to live your most sexually empowered life.